What We Need
by Legwarmer
Summary: ...Completed...The Phantom thinks about why his relationship to Madame Giry starts to break down and what they need to save it.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is a songfic, but it's different from the way the other authors write them. You'll find out anyway, so there's no need for me to explain it to you, huh? Besides, the song is German so I had to translate it. That's why it doesn't rhyme anymore. Okay, this is my second fanfic concerning POTO, and I hope you like it. Maybe you could review it, I would really appreciate it.**

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**What We Need**

From the day you've saved me I knew there was something between us. Maybe it was this majical aura you always took with you wherever you went; maybe it was my heart that was treated nicely the first time ever what caused me to love you. But time used to make us older and silence made me fear what came just in the last months. I was quiet about it, never wanted to waste the time we spent together during the night. Other things filled your mind and for you I was only the Phantom that accompanied you at night – not the one to love you anymore. That was when you started to work as a ballet teacher.

"I need to do this, Erik, ballet is my life," you said and kissed my cheek, "and it's what I can do best. You'll see." You kissed me every night, but soon your thoughts left our bed and went up again, back to the Opera to your élèves. Ballet grabbed you and didn't seem to ever give you back. I didn't understand you. I tried to, hard, but we couldn't go on like this. You were seperated from me. I tried lots of things, then. I put all my hope into the power of looks, I tried to catch your eyes and look at you. Maybe my eyes could tell you what I couldn't. I thought it to be a better way than cursing ballet. Don't shame the truth with bitter curses, my Madame, it's not good. I didn't want to give you hidden hints, didn't want to make you think about "us" just because something told you that we didn't fit together anymore. We had to get there by ourselves.

You did not respond to any of my looks. For you, it was only my hand touching you at night, without any message trying to reach out for you. Did I try hard enough?

Take it, my Madame, that my heart breaks. Our love is frozen. I've watched out for your loving look for so long – you never gave it to me. By time, I wondered whether you were as cold as ice. And I swore to myself, if I ever found that your soul stopped speaking to me at all, I would loose this battle and leave you. There was no sense in holding you by me. I would let you go.

My heart breaks. With every second of the day you don't think of me it gets worse. It breaks if you don't see that we belong together. You are made for me, and I am made for you. We had it, we had our love, our passion. But where did it go?

Now, when I look at you, you stand next to me once, the other time I stand here. It's not that different. There's no sense in where we are anymore, not for you. You don't care.I bitterly lost your love.

My life turned into a blank battle of surviving. The only reason that I keep myself warm is just so that I don't freeze to death. I lost all the joys of the day you gave me, I forgot how the birds sing and how beautiful the darkness of the night is. All I need is a bit of light. Just a small one.

And my heart breaks and breaks. What we need isn't time. It's love. Time took all those things away, but love can bring them back. Can you give this to me? Or, can you give this to yourself? For your soul gave up speaking maybe too long ago…

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**Take it**

I have to try and understand you

Because we can't go on like this,

We have to try to look into each other's eyes

And not to shame the truth with cursing

We have to get there for those who follow

Let's ignore the time of signs.

_Take it that my heart breaks,_

_For our love is frozen_

_If your soul stopped speaking_

_I would loose this battle._

My heart breaks if we don't see

That we belong together

And if we don't stop to destroy our lives

When I look at you you're next to me,

Once you stand there, once I stand here,

It's not that different, not that different

I keep me warm just so that I don't freeze

Keep me warm just so that I don't freeze

_What we need isn't time but love_

_It would be hard for me not to write my songs_

_But I write them for you and I write them for me_

_All I need is a bit of light_

_So don't change me before your soul stops speaking._


	2. Black Roses And Wine

**A/N: Okay, yes, I do know that this should have been a one-shot. But somehow, I needed to add this. I just found the songtext, and I think it fits. Well, tell me what you think. This is, besides, the last chapter, there's nothing else going to be added.

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**What We Need**

**Chapter 2 – _Black Roses and Wine_**

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I decided to give the two of us a last chance. Maybe it was not a good idea, as I know now, standing here on the bridge in the middle of Paris. I look down onto the river, the dirty river, the only friend of Paris. I left the Opera hours ago, packed my things, and so I stand here. I came out of my catacombs. Live has so many things to give, if it wouldn't take half of them away again. 

Oh, my river, let me tell you a story of a love that I left behind. It's been really long since I felt good, it was a broken fairy tale. I really tried to keep up with her, with my Madame, and it took me a lot. I gave up all the pride I had inside, left all my dignity in the darkness and faced the day. Well, I faced my Madame's room which is, in this case, exactly the same. I tore me all apart when she played with my heart, this Madame who has so much of me in her hand. Who plays with it like a child who doesn't know how to use a fork.

In front of my inner eye, the day passes by again. I paint a picture of a cold and rainy night, indeed, it embodies my feelings. I went up to your room, my Madame, to spent the last night we would ever have together, and when the candles faded to black, I sang your favourite song. It was about love, it was about fairy tales, it was about heaven on earth. I remembered how I met you, when I sang to you, and I have to say that it touched me deeply. I have never sung a song that was so intense. Never. It was for you. My last night. We spoke to each other, and you've played your last hand.

Later, I left. We didn't sleep together tonight, of course, it would have been a waste of time. I wanted to look at you the way you haven't let me look at you for the last months. All you gave me was your body, and maybe you thought I'd be too man to turn down that offer. But I am not. Indeed, I have a heart, my dear, my Madame, which you obviously failed to see. I watched you, while the moonlight bathed the room and I knew it would be the last time I'd see you. But there was nothing tragic about it, it was peaceful, you didn't know about my plans of leaving you without having said a word. You were innocent, maybe I was either. Maybe it was only time that played a trick on us and our love was not strong enough to play back some tricks.

I don't know whether you felt our last night. Could be that it was just a night we spent differently, could be that you haven't noticed anything at all. You are so into your ballet thing.

The only things I left behind were black roses and a bottle of wine. You'll recognize that I'm missing, Giry, I know it. Keep searching, because it's so hard to find, the reason, the only reason for my leaving. You think I left because I didn't like the Opera? You think I left because I had some things to do? I left because your love left me, a long time ago. All I have is a trunk with some papers of my poems to you and my tears that I cry. And you, you have my black roses.

But my leaving started before. It was about the time that I realised it's been a sorry situation – my castle's made of sand. I built on your love, an element which is not to control. It washes out to the sea.

Tonight, I've pushed my love aside and cried my last cry. I have nothing. Nothing.

I don't know what to do with my life. I look down into the river, hey you, I think, why don't you give me a new home? Somewhere to go, somebody to love? I will find those things, I am sure.

I don't know whether I wasn't right for you or you weren't right for me. Maybe I was too chicken to try hard enough. You let your love for me die, and one doesn't wake the deads.

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Whoa, hah  
Yeah  
Aha

Tell you a story of a love I left behind  
It was a broken fairy tale  
I gave up all my pride  
Let love inside  
But tore me all apart when you played with my heart

Let me paint a picture of a cold and rainy night  
As the candles fade to black  
I played our favourite song  
'Til the needle was gone  
I've taken all I can  
You've played your last hand

Black roses and a bottle of wine  
Those were the only things that I left behind  
Keep searching 'cause it's so hard to find  
All you got are tears that you cry  
Black roses and wine

Oh yeah  
Sorry situation when your' castles made of sand  
And it washes out to sea  
I pushed your love aside  
Cried my last cry  
My sould is in bloom  
Like flowers in June

Black roses and a bottle of wine  
Those were the only things that I left behind  
Keep searching 'cause it's so hard to find  
All you got are tears that you cry  
Black roses and wine

Black roses and a bottle of wine  
Those were the only things that I left behind  
Keep searching 'cause it's so hard to find  
All you got are tears that you cry  
Black roses and wine

You don't miss your water 'til your well runs dry  
You don't miss your good thing, 'til it passes you by  
Like a bird in the sky, spread your wings and fly

Oh yeah  
Yeah yeah yeah

Black roses and a bottle of wine  
Those were the only things that I left behind  
C'mon keep searching 'cause it's so hard to find  
All you got are tears that you cry  
Black roses and wine

**By Anastacia

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the ending


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